I'll take some magic

There are a few things that I wish I had when it comes to these two lil babes.

1) Another set of arms.  Or another two sets of arms.  To hold, carry, rock, help nurse. .
2) Another set of boobs, going along with the above number 1
3) A time machine.
I would go back to pre-twin Kristen and tell her her life is easy.  Stop complaining.
I would travel to the future to check on my grown babies in order to put my mind at ease.  They are alive and thriving, stop worrying. 
4) A pause button.  I'd love to pause time every time my babies look at each other and smile, or hold hands.  I'd pause every time Wes is making Finn giggle because he is the only one who can make that boy laugh like that.  And I'd pause every time they look up at me and smile while I'm rocking them to sleep.

5) A nail trimming fairy.  I honestly trim their little razor finger nails every day.  I thought it'd be easy to trim using nail clippers until I snipped the tip of Finn's little finger.  And it bled.  And he cried.  Now I file 20 little constantly moving finger nails daily.  Otherwise I have claw marks all over my face, neck, and chest. 
6) A shot-free way to get immunizations.  I can not handle them getting shots.  I just can't.  Finn cries for a second, and then gets over it.  Audrey screams like you cut off her leg.  Hyperventilates even. 
7) A quick fix of my belly button.  I'm serious.  My belly button is forever changed.  Sometimes I look at old pictures of me in a bikini and throw a little pity party.  Goodbye perfect little innie belly button, hello perfect little babies.
8) A way to understand baby whining. For the most part I know what they need.  Feed.  Change.  Sleep. But sometimes (mostly Audrey) they cry.  A lot.  I've changed, fed, and they've napped, and still they cry.
           Side note on understanding babies-
 There are 3 things I don't understand about babies:
       1) When they are sleepy, why do they fight it?  You're tired, close your eyes. Easy as that.
       2) When they roll to their tummy from their back and then cry cause they hate being on their tummy.  Audrey does this ALL DAY long.  Rolls to her tummy and then cries. It's especially fun at 4 am when she does this in her crib.
       3) How they can be crying, screaming, at the top of their lungs, with one little tear rolling down their face, and as soon as dad  walks in they stop.  Smile even.  Not Fair. Boo.


I'm not asking for much here people, just a few small requests.
A time machine, a couple of extra appendages, and a fairy.  Magic.  Someone get me some magic.